THNP

Journal

2026

If you've started researching birth plans, you've probably discovered two very different camps on the internet.


Camp #1 says you need a detailed, color-coded, laminated, three-page document outlining every possible labor scenario.


Camp #2 says, "Don't bother. Babies do whatever they want anyway."


As it turns out, both sides have a point.


A birth plan can be incredibly helpful—but not because it guarantees your labor will go exactly as planned. (Spoiler alert: babies are not known for respecting schedules.)


The real purpose of a birth plan is to help you think through your preferences, communicate with your healthcare team, and feel more confident heading into one of the biggest days of your life.


Let's talk about how to create a birth plan that actually works—without setting yourself up for disappointment if things take an unexpected turn.


First Things First: What Is a Birth Plan?

A birth plan is simply a document that outlines your preferences for labor, delivery, and immediate postpartum care.


Think of it less as a rigid blueprint and more as a "wish list."


Because if pregnancy teaches us anything, it's that humans begin ignoring our plans long before they're born.


Your birth plan helps your healthcare team understand what's important to you while allowing room for medical decisions if circumstances change.


Important Decisions to Consider

Before you start filling out templates online, take some time to think about what matters most to you.


Who Do You Want in the Delivery Room?

Some moms want their partner, their mom, a doula, and a support team worthy of a championship football game.


Others want as few people as possible.

There is no right answer.


Ask yourself:

  • Who helps me feel calm?
  • Who advocates well for me?
  • Who might accidentally stress me out?


Remember: labor is not the time to worry about hurting someone's feelings.


Pain Management Preferences

This is often one of the biggest sections of a birth plan.


Some women hope for an unmedicated birth.

Some know from day one they want an epidural.

Some plan one thing and decide differently once contractions arrive.


And that's okay.


Consider:

  • Are you interested in pain medication?
  • Would you like to try other comfort measures first?
  • Are there specific techniques you'd like to use?


Your birth plan can state preferences without locking you into a decision.


Labor Environment

Believe it or not, small details can make a big difference.


Think about:

  • Lighting preferences
  • Music or playlists
  • Essential oils (if allowed)
  • Movement during labor
  • Laboring in a shower or tub


Will your carefully curated labor playlist actually play while you're having contractions?

Maybe.

But it's nice to have options.


Delivery Preferences

Some things to consider include:

  • Pushing positions
  • Use of mirrors during delivery
  • Delayed cord clamping
  • Skin-to-skin contact immediately after birth


Not everyone has strong opinions about these choices, but it's worth thinking through them ahead of time.


Newborn Care Preferences

After your baby arrives, there are still decisions to be made.


Examples include:

  • Feeding preferences
  • Vitamin K injection
  • Eye ointment
  • Rooming-in with baby



Discuss these topics with your healthcare provider beforehand so you feel informed and prepared.


Questions to Ask Your Healthcare Provider

One of the smartest things you can do while creating your birth plan is ask questions.

Lots of questions.


Your provider has likely seen every labor scenario imaginable.

Take advantage of that experience.


Here are a few helpful questions:


What Is Your Typical Approach to Labor and Delivery?

Every provider and hospital has slightly different routines.

Understanding them can help prevent surprises later.


What Happens If Labor Doesn't Progress?

Knowing the possible next steps ahead of time can make decisions less overwhelming if they arise.


What Pain Relief Options Are Available?

Even if you're planning an unmedicated birth, it's helpful to know your options.

Knowledge is never wasted.


What Hospital Policies Should I Know About?

Ask about:

  • Visitor policies
  • Inductions
  • Cesarean births
  • Newborn procedures


The more informed you are, the more confident you'll feel.



Under What Circumstances Might My Birth Plan Need to Change?

This question can be incredibly valuable.

It helps you understand potential medical situations while keeping expectations realistic.


Expecting Hampton, Virginia resident posing for her maternity session at a local city park.
Expecting mom holding her round belly in Gloucester, Virginia.
Expecting mother frolicking in a local Chesapeake, Virginia in a local park for a maternity session.
Expecting couple posing for a maternity photographer on their property in Suffolk, Virginia.
Expecting father holding his wife's belly during their maternity session at a local park in Gloucester, Virginia.
Expecting mother and father staring in each other's eyes in front of their huge tree on their property in Suffolk, Virginia.
Baby bump photo of an expecting mom while she fishes in her backyard in Chesapeake, Virginia.
Expecting couple posing for a maternity photo in the garden of a local Chesapeake, Virginia park.
Expecting couple walking down a beach access in Virginia Beach during their maternity session.
A family portrait of a Chesapeake, Virginia family in their personal boat in their backyard.
Expecting mother posing during her maternity session in Virginia Beach.
A beautiful portrait of an expecting mother in a park in Chesapeake, Virginia.
The Secret to a Birth Plan That Actually Works

Ready for the biggest tip of all?

Stay flexible.

I know.


Not exactly groundbreaking advice.

But it's also the part many expecting parents struggle with.

The truth is, labor is unpredictable.


You can spend months preparing for an unmedicated birth and decide you'd like an epidural.

You can plan on laboring in the tub and discover that walking feels better.

You can create the most beautiful birth plan ever written and still encounter unexpected twists.


None of that means you failed.


A successful birth isn't defined by how closely events match a document.

It's defined by making informed decisions, staying safe, and bringing your baby into the world.


What to Include on Your Actual Birth Plan

Keep it simple.

Healthcare teams appreciate concise information they can quickly review.


Consider including:

  • Your name and provider
  • Support people
  • Pain management preferences
  • Labor preferences
  • Delivery preferences
  • Newborn care preferences


One page is often plenty.


Remember, nurses don't need your five-paragraph explanation about why a certain playlist is emotionally significant.


(Although we fully support your attachment to 90s love songs.)


Expecting Norfolk, Virginia couple having a dance in Virginia Beach during their maternity session.
Expecting mother posing in the snow in Suffolk, Virginia during her maternity session.
Expecting family sharing a sweet moment at a local studio in Chesapeake, Virginia.
Expecting mother in a red dress posing on a beach in Virginia Beach, Virginia.
Suffolk expecting mother posing in the snow at a local Suffolk city park.
Big brother sharing a kiss to his new sibling at a maternity session in Chesapeake, VA.
Final Thoughts

Creating a birth plan isn't about controlling every moment of labor.


Because let's be honest—labor has a way of laughing at our attempts to control anything.

Instead, think of your birth plan as a communication tool.


It's an opportunity to learn about your options, think through important decisions, and share your preferences with the people caring for you.


And if your labor unfolds differently than expected?

That's okay too.


The goal was never a perfect birth plan.

The goal was always a healthy mom, a healthy baby, and the confidence to navigate whatever surprises delivery day brings.


Because if parenthood teaches us anything, it's that flexibility starts long before the baby arrives.