September 28, 2014
Pregnancy was a bit rough, lots of nausea with her and I couldn't stand the smell of most foods. My initial OB appointment was awful - the doctor was extremely insensitive & rude! So I changed providers immediately & the next one was much better. The rest of the pregnancy went smoothly & once I reached 39 weeks the OB made me schedule an induction in case I didn't go into labor by her EDD (estimated due date). I thought this odd but brushed it off & made the appointment. Luckily my girl was ready to come the day before her EDD.
We thought I was in active labor earlier in the day so we went to the hospital & hopper to be admitted but I didn't progress enough while there so they sent me home. Once we were home, I decided to go to bed . At 4 am my water broke & we rushed to the hospital once again. I was admitted right away & this is when things started to seem rushed & out of my control. I had a birth plan going in & voiced it to the staff, however I was dismissed & coheres several times within the first few hours. I ended up giving in to an epidural & to this day I am still mad at myself for it! The rest of my labor was easy due to the epidural, however it also slowed down due to it. Shift change was about to happen for the staff & so the conversation of speeding things along started ( I had only been in labor for 10hrs at this point). Petocin was mentioned & I let the nurse know that I did not want petocin so she advocated that for me. Luckily the doctors listened to her and the nurse had them leave the room. After they left the room she helped me by asking me to reposition in a few different positions to help bring my baby into the birthing canal. It worked! Doctors reentered the room & after 3 pushes she was out! The experience was lost on me though because I did not feel her enter into the world & I felt cheated! I was so numbed by the epidural that I couldn't even feel when I needed to push so the nurse had to instruct me when to. This may not matter to some of you but it mattered to me so it made me sad!
What I learned.....
▪️I Should have done more research & asked more questions regarding the process of a hospital birth.
▪️That in the hospital your wishes often will be dismissed if it doesn't serve them well during the moment.
▪️That an epidural slows down the birthing process and prolongs your healing process postpartum.
▪️That having someone by your side to advocate for you is worth EVERYTHING!